It is hard to refute that relationships are like glass mirrors that need to be handled with care. A thoughtless word or a careless action can harm a relationship beyond repair.
This reminds me of an incident that happened when I was a little girl. As usual my mom returned from work very tired. Even I was able to understand how hard the day should have been for her. She prepared dinner for us.
After some time my dad joined us for dinner. My mom placed a plate of fruits and very badly burnt toast in front of him. I noticed it and felt bad. I thought my dad would not like it. But he surprised me by reaching for his toast with a smile; he looked at me and kindly asked me how my day was at school. He went on silently smearing butter and jelly on the toast and ate it with relish! I wondered how he could savor it.
I heard my mom apologizing to my dad for burning the toast. His reply was simply, "I love you darling. I liked it."
When I went to kiss him good night, I asked him if he really liked his toast burnt. He embraced me and said, "Dear, How tired your mom should have been to let the toast become burnt? A little burnt toast is not going to hurt me. You know, imperfect things do have their places in life. Am I the best man in the world? Am I in any way better housekeeper or cook than your mom? Perfection is always a target and we should keep on moving towards it. We are always in the midst of imperfection and trying to improve. We should not hate imperfect things and imperfect people, though we should passionately try to become perfect."
That night I lay awake for a long time, pondering over what my dad had said and the truth in his words.
I learnt that sincere and ceaseless attempt to become faultless did not necessarily imply anger and hatred towards imperfection; it is the most important principle to develop and foster healthy and lasting relationships in life. My dad is no more but his words of wisdom guide me for ever. He always said and meant – "Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to you".
All of us should learn to take the good and bad, the ugly and beautiful, the friendly and inimical factors of our relationships with equanimity; thank God for His Grace, and pray to Him to bless us; to help us progress with love towards perfection. He alone can give us a relationship that is not so fragile as to get broken by a burnt toast. For any relationship, let it be that of parent and child, husband and wife, teacher and student, boss and employer and so on, if we make the foundation of 'understanding' strong, we can definitely move towards perfection and no imperfection can impede us.
Thanks to Sarda Mohan / K S Venkataraman Is the Associate Editor, Dynamic Youth Online Magazine.
