Who Packed Your Parachute?

As a leader, do you honor and appreciate the power of WE? Do you stop to thank and recognize the members of your team? Do you consistently show an attitude of gratitude?

I recently read a great story about Captain Charles Plumb, a graduate from the Naval Academy, whose plane, after 74 successful combat missions over North Vietnam, was shot down. He parachuted to safety, but was captured, tortured and spent 2,103 days in a small box-like cell.

After surviving the ordeal, Captain Plumb received the Silver Star, Bronze Star, the Legion of Merit and two Purple Hearts, and returned to America and spoke to many groups about his experience and how it compared to the challenges of every day life.

Shortly after coming home, Charlie and his wife were sitting in a restaurant. A man rose from a nearby table, walked over and said, "You're Plumb! You flew jet fighters in Vietnam from the aircraft carrier Kitty Hawk. You were shot down!"

Surprised that he was recognized, Charlie responded, "How in the world did you know that?" The man replied, "I packed your parachute." Charlie looked up with surprise. The man pumped his hand, gave a thumbs-up, and said, "I guess it worked!"

Charlie stood to shake the man's hand, and assured him, "It most certainly did work. If it had not worked, I would not be here today."

Charlie could not sleep that night, thinking about the man. He wondered if he might have seen him and not even said, "Good morning, how are you?" He thought of the many hours the sailor had spent bending over a long wooden table in the bottom of the ship, carefully folding the silks and weaving the shrouds of each chute, each time holding in his hands the fate of someone he didn't know.

Plumb then began to realize that along with the physical parachute, he needed mental, emotional and spiritual parachutes. He had called on all these supports during his long and painful ordeal.

As a leader, how many times a day, a week, a month, do we pass up the opportunity to thank those people in our organization who are "packing our parachutes?"

An Excerpt from Aim for the Heart By Tom Mathews

Back to Basics for Strong, Healthy Backs

Back pain and injuries are among the most common causes of lost workdays and long-term disability. About 80 percent of adults suffer from back pain at some time in their lives, and hundreds of thousands of workers suffer disabling back injuries on the job every year.

When you think about it, it's not surprising that there are so many back injuries. Just look at the back's unique structure and role. The back is made up of a complicated network of muscles and bones that literally hold up the body and control much of a person's daily movements.

So when the back's abused, the consequences can be serious and sometimes incapacitating. One wrong move can be a very painful mistake, and long-term stresses and strains on the back can cause deterioration, chronic pain, and disability.

Safe Lifting

Perhaps the most important area to emphasize about back safety on the job is lifting. Improper lifting is believed to account for up to half of all job-related back injuries.

Training in the proper lifting technique can go a long way toward keeping workers healthy and on the job. Make sure your employees know these simple steps in safe lifting:

• Stand close to the load with both feet firm on the floor and spread at about shoulder width, with the toes pointing out.
• Squat down, close to the load, keeping your back straight, bending at the knees.
• Grip the load firmly with your hands, not just your fingers. Place your hands on diagonally opposite corners so that one hand pulls it toward you and one lifts.
• Bring the load as close as possible to your body. Keep your weight centered over your feet, arms and elbows tucked in to your sides, and chin tucked in to your neck.
• Then lift gradually and smoothly, letting your legs do the work. With the back still straight, lift head and shoulders first while the legs push the body up smoothly.

Other Preventive Measures

Lifting isn't the only cause of back injuries, of course. Most people put unnecessary strain on their backs in a variety of other ways. For example:

Excess Weight—especially potbellies—puts constant strain on the back. That's just one more reason to watch what and how much you eat.

Lack Of Exercise. Exercise strengthens back and abdominal muscles used in lifting and other related tasks. It also reduces stress and increases flexibility.

Poor Posture—whether sitting, standing, or driving—is a major cause of back strain. When you slouch, the ligaments, rather than the muscles, are forced to do the work of supporting the body, which puts pressure on the vertebrae.

Bending and Twisting are both killers on the back. Workers should try to limit bending and twisting motions—for example, by placing objects on tables or other elevated surfaces rather than on the floor so that they don't have to bend and lift.

Thanks to BLR's Safety Meetings

Seven Ways Admins Can Maintain Work-Life Balance

Many work-life coaches glibly assert that administrative professionals must be responsible for achieving their own balance in the face of ever-increasing demands -- from 9 to 5 and beyond. But given their spot in the org chart, admins often feel compelled to sacrifice too much for their jobs.

"It's a partnership, but management has the bigger responsibility for admins' work-life balance, because how work is structured affects the ability of admins to have balance," says Ellen Kossek, a coauthor of CEO of Me: Creating a Life that Works in the Flexible Job Age and a professor of human resource management and organizational behavior at Michigan State University. Backup arrangements and rules about work schedules are examples of management and HR policies that can constrain an admin's ability to maintain balance.

With these challenging dynamics in mind, here are seven tips for admins who want to get a life -- or keep the one they've got -- while performing to their bosses' expectations.

 

1. Establish Limits Early Through Strategic Questions

When's the best time to set up work-life balance? When you're new to the job or, even better, weighing a job offer. But do it tactfully. "You've got a certain set of things you want to happen in the negotiation, but you can't say, 'This is the way it's going to be,'" says Kevin Wilson, coauthor of Administrative Assistant's and Secretary's Handbook. "So ask questions like, 'When would you expect me to be on call when I'm out of the office?'"

2. Don't Give Your Boss 24/7 Access Via Technology

When your manager hands you a shiny new laptop or handheld email device, remember it can turn out to be more of a burden than a status symbol.

"I have a Treo, but I'm only accessible that way while I'm at work," says Marlana Simmen, executive assistant to the CEO of Workplace Options, which provides work-life programs to employers. "There was a clear understanding from the beginning that nights and weekends are usually not work hours." In a special situation, Simmen's boss will call her cell phone.

3. Don't Let Your Inbox Manage You

It's a natural but potentially destructive habit to immediately act on every message that interrupts you -- whether you're at your desk or snoozing in a hammock on a Sunday afternoon. So train yourself to think before you check email or voice mail.

"It's usually not necessary to respond to emails on weekends or at night," says Jim Bird, CEO of WorkLifeBalance.com. "Just because it's convenient for the boss to get them out then, it doesn't mean they expect an immediate response."

4. Make Priorities Explicit

"List your work priorities for the week with expected dates of completion," suggests Bird. "On Monday morning, share the list with the people you support, and ask if they need to change any priorities. As they add items through the week, ask if they need to change your priorities."

5. Be Flexible, Too

There's no balance without give-and-take. So be flexible when you can, and expect your manager to reciprocate.

"I had some minor back surgery recently," says Simmen. "The boss was very flexible about me working from home during my recovery. In return, I scheduled the surgery when there weren't any site visits."

6. Create a Cheat Sheet for Emergencies

When your personal life calls –- especially if you care for children or aging parents -– you may need to make an abrupt departure from the office. You'll save yourself a lot of stress just by preparing for this eventuality.

"Make sure your managers know how to do things like book a meeting room," says Wilson. "Put together a cheat sheet for them in case you have to run out the door."

7. Prioritize Your Well-Being

Finally, if necessary, tactfully remind your boss you won't be able to perform to your potential unless you have time for R&R -- in the form of most evenings and weekends off work and vacations free from interruption, or nearly so.

"For their health, admins need time to recover from work," says Kossek.

 

By John Rossheim, Monster Senior Contributing Writer

Jack Welch: 'Work/Life Balance Is a Terrible Term' (Part 2)

"Work/Life Balance is a terrible term," says Jack Welch. The term should be "work/life choices." Different choices are not bad choices, but we need to recognize that there are choices and that the choices have consequences.

Welch, former head of GE and a staunch supporter of HR, made his remarks at the recent Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) Conference and Exposition in New Orleans.

As to the specific issue of women who take time off for children and then want to return to the workforce, Welch said, "In my experience, it's rare for someone to stop for a period of years—go off-track—and then come back and rise to the top." They can have good careers after they come back, but they will not likely achieve the top ranks, he said.

How About the Need for Estrogen?

How about the need for estrogen? asked Welch's wife, Suzy, who moderated the session. "There are indicators that diverse groups make better decisions," he responded.

Mentoring—'The Worst Idea'

Mentoring is "The worst idea ever to come down the pike," Welch said. "You could end up with someone who is unliked, or someone who's a horse's ass."

His advice is to look at everyone as a teacher and pick up bits from here and there. "I was a PhD chemical engineer, and I just figured it out," he said. "I read everything and talked to everybody."

Excuses

Welch said that some people's excuse for why other managers get what they want is that "The CEO likes them." No, said Welch, that's not the reason. "They know how to handle the CEO. There's a difference."

To get that strategic seat that HR managers crave, said Welch, "One word—overdeliver." Make your bosses look smarter, he said.

"In my companies, my corporate HR person gets the company HR managers together with their CEOs and boards every few months," Welch said. "I make it happen."

Times Are Changing

"Take a look at your compensation program," said Welch. "I guarantee it's stale, probably written in 2007." Welch was incensed when he saw a fellow MIT professor using teaching notes that were 4 years old. "How can that be?" he said. "So much has changed."

How about your policies and procedures? Still 2007 vintage? We've just seen major changes to the FMLA. The ADA, military leave, accommodation rules—the list of new policy requirements seems endless. But you can't backburner work on your policies—they're your only hope for consistent and compliant management that avoids lawsuits.

Thanks to BLR HR Daily Advisor

How to Handle Panic Attacks

It may seem hard to get a grip on anxiety during a panic attack, but learning the right techniques can help you get your anxiety back under control.

Panic attacks can be terrifying. These attacks stem from profound anxiety that can make your heart pound and your knees go weak. Panic attacks can make it difficult to catch your breath and can also cause chest pain and dizziness — you may even think you're having a heart attack. A panic attack may only last a few minutes, but it can leave you feeling frightened and uneasy.

Understanding Panic Attacks

A panic attack and its symptoms of tremendous anxiety can strike suddenly, out of the blue. While a panic attack itself may be brief, it can lead to a lasting fear of having another episode. When panic attacks and the fear of having attacks occur repeatedly, people are said to have a panic disorder, a type of anxiety disorder.

"People have these panic attacks under various circumstances," explains Martin N. Seif, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York City and Greenwich, Conn. They constantly worry about having an attack and may avoid certain situations as a result. Eventually, people with panic disorder may realize that they aren't actually afraid of the situation they're avoiding, but rather of experiencing additional panic attacks, notes Seif.

Fortunately, you don't have to live in fear of panic attacks. There are specific strategies you can use to help manage your anxiety and control your physical symptoms as well.

Panic Attacks: How to Take Control

The best way to stave off future panic attacks is by learning how to control your anxiety so that if you do start to notice symptoms of a panic attack, you can calm your mind and body until the symptoms fade.

"People who experience panic attacks have to learn how to cope with their feelings of panic," says Seif. While medication can be effective, cognitive-behavioral therapy is one of the best techniques for managing panic and anxiety. "It involves recognizing that the panic-producing process is fueled by future-oriented, catastrophic thinking," explains Seif. People with panic disorder have to become aware that their thoughts trigger a physical reaction, which results in a panic attack.

To gain control over panic disorder, it's important to learn and practice anxiety management techniques, says Seif. Strategies that you can use to help you curb a panic attack include:

• Breathing Slowly and Deeply. Anxiety can cause you to breathe very quickly, which makes both the mental and physical symptoms of a panic attack even worse. When you start to feel panicky, be sure to take slow, deep breaths to soothe your mind and body.
• Stop and Think. When your thoughts start spinning out of control, simply tell yourself to stop. Organize your thoughts and decide what you need to do to get yourself calm again.
• Think Positively. Push negative thoughts out of your mind, and remind yourself that you are in control. Think about times when you've been able to manage situations successfully and reduce anxiety.
• Stand Up for Yourself. If you need to leave a situation, do so or tell someone you need to leave. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Allowing yourself to become more upset will not help if what you really need is to take a walk and blow off some steam.
• Relax Your Muscles. Anxiety causes your entire body to tense up, so make a conscious effort to relax each muscle from your toes all the way up to your neck and face.

Don't wait for a panic attack to begin to try these techniques. Seif notes that it's important to use these strategies regularly and learn to manage your anxiety in gradual stages. As you become more confident that you can rein in a panic attack, you can walk out the door each day breathing easier.

Thanks to EverydayHealth.com. © 2009

Jack Welch: 'HR, Get Out of the Picnic Business'

"How many out there (of perhaps 6,000 HR managers in the audience) are perceived by your organizations as equal in importance to the CFO?" Jack Welch asked. About 10 percent believed they were. "That's not enough," he said.

Welch, former head of GE and a great supporter of HR, offered his tips for HR managers at the recent Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) Conference and Exposition in New Orleans.

 

If I Owned a Football Team

Welch said that if you owned a football team, you wouldn't hang around with the accountant. You'd hang around with the manager of player personnel. That's where the action is. And that's how it should be for HR managers everywhere.

How do you make your case? "Get out of the picnic and insurance forms business," Welch said.

Honesty In Evaluation

No employee should wonder where he or she stands. When we have layoffs, all the affected personnel are saying, "Why me?" That means there haven't been good evaluations, Welch says.

Isn't the 20-70-10 System Barbaric?

Welch spoke about his famous (or infamous) 20-70-10 system that he installed at GE. (Briefly, under the system, 20 percent are rated as exceptional, 70 percent as fine, and the bottom 10 percent are eliminated.) Don't get the wrong idea about the 10 percent, he says. "The idea wasn't to machine-gun them—we worked with them, found a better situation for them, or helped them move on. Many of them had very successful careers."

"The number one thing to do to prove your value is to develop rigorous development and evaluation plans," Welch said.

"I don't want to work for the man."

The shock of the downturn has many employees thinking, "I don't like this." Your stars might stay a while, but when things get better, they're going to want out—a chance to control their own destinies—unless they work for a company that offers flexibility, growth, and excitement.

Challenge your organization to create that kind of atmosphere—"Grab them by the shirts." In today's market, you have to get creative taking care of the best and raising the average. "Make it better every day," Welch said. Do not be a victim, a player who doesn't suit up for the game.

Communicate like Hell

Everybody is scared these days, said Welch. Are you feeling excitement, thinking about new ways of doing things, and how to restructure to come out thriving? Or are you hunkering down scared? "You have to make it vibrate—feel the excitement of tomorrow not the pain of today."

No whining, said Welch. And no over-positive cheerleading either. "People don't want cheerleaders when the thing is leaking," he added.

Walk the floor, tweet, do what you can to communicate, so employees think, "They're working for me."

Long-Term and Short-Term Management

"First of all," said Welch, "recognize that any jackass can manage for the short term—you just squeeze the hell out of it." And any jackass can manage for the long term—you just share your dream. But you have to do both, and that is hard.

Welch on HR: "HR is important in good times; it defines bad times."

Thanks to BLR HR Daily Advisor

Change Your Life

At any time in our life, we have the opportunity to correct or improve those aspects of our lives that pinch us. We make resolutions to improve ourselves and, therefore, our opinion of ourselves. We often break those resolutions because we are not fully committed to them. They are merely wishes, not heartfelt desires. We must resolve to make those changes in our lives that will allow us to live our lives to the fullest.

Tips for Life Changes

1. Focus on what you want, and not what you don't want.
2. See the big picture and keep your eyes upon it-not upon the ground looking for those painful boulders that may get in the way. Keep your eye on the donut, not upon the hole.
3. Create a plan for the change and work that plan.
4. Watch what you say - words are powerful messengers that will race out and will bring to you exactly what you ask for.
5. Recall a time when you were successful or felt good about a situation or condition. Build upon what worked, not on what did not work. Ask yourself these questions: (a) What were the circumstances that led me to feel good about myself? (b) How did I feel, look, act, and respond to what was going on in my life? (c) What can I do to recreate that situation and/or those feelings?
6. Choose what you are focusing on and thinking about. If you don't like the picture that you are seeing, pick up the remote control and change the channel to a more pleasant and satisfying picture.
7. If getting (back) into shape is one of your goals - be realistic about what you want to accomplish, be focused on how you will look and feel. When you begin to recall the "pain and suffering" that you feel goes along with the exercise program, hang up on that negative chatter in your head.
8. Will power is not the major ingredient when successfully changing an aspect of your life, but a decision and commitment to yourself are.
9. Don't be an excusiologist (one who has a Ph.D. in excuse making). There may be legitimate reasons, but there are no excuses.
10. We will make a change in our lives for one of two reasons: to avoid pain or to gain pleasure. Which one is it for you? Have you experienced enough pain yet?
11. 11. Stop whining and start winning... Remember any day that we are above ground is a good day!

Affirmation:
"When I am calm and attentive, I am able receive the powerful messages in my life!" 
 
Have a resolving and successful week!

Thanks to Mary Rau-Foster / WorkPlaceIssues

Brainstorming Reloaded

Why Brainstorming Is Ineffective & How To Fix It.

Brainstorming was once thought a fantastic way for groups to generate new ideas. Although not as fashionable as it once was, brainstorming is still frequently used in business and, often inadvertently, for all sorts of personal decisions; people happily brainstorm for holiday destinations, restaurants and even new careers.

Brainstorming certainly looks like a great way of dealing with some of the problems associated with decision-making and creativity in groups, such as groupthink and people's failure to share information effectively. By suspending evaluation, encouraging a relaxed atmosphere and quantity over quality, the brainstorming session is supposed to foster creativity.

But now we know that brainstorming doesn't actually work that well. Experiment after experiment has shown that people in brainstorming sessions produce fewer and lower quality ideas than those working alone (Furnham, 2000). Here's why:

1. Social loafing: people slack off to a frightening degree in certain types of group situations like brainstorming.
2. Evaluation apprehension: although evaluation isn't allowed in a traditional brainstorming session, everyone knows others are scrutinizing their input.
3. Production blocking: while one person is talking the others have to wait. They then forget or dismiss their ideas, which consequently never see the light of day.

So if groups need to generate new ideas, new connections between old ideas and new ways of seeing the world, how should they proceed? The answer is that brainstorming needs a tweak.

Brainstorming Reloaded

Inspiration for ways to get around these problems comes from the research on electronic brainstorming. Gallupe and Cooper (1993) found that electronically mediated brainstormers generated more high quality ideas than face-to-face brainstomers.

In this research brainstormers typed in their ideas to a computer which also displayed other people's ideas at the same time. This rather neatly gets around the social loafing and production blocking problems.

These ideas can be used to motivate face-to-face brainstormers to produce better results (from Furnham, 2000):

• People should be encouraged to list ideas before coming to brainstorming sessions.
• The number of ideas produced by each person should be monitored.
• Problems should be broken down and group members should brainstorm components.
• Groups should take breaks from each other.
• High standards should be set for the number of ideas.

But why bother to try and 'fix' brainstorming at all? Why not just send people off individually to generate ideas if this is more efficient? The answer is because of its ability to build consensus by giving participants the feeling of involvement in the process. People who have participated in the creative stage are likely to be more motivated to carry out the group's decision.

Also it emerges that groups do have a natural talent, which is the evaluation of ideas, rather than their creation. The conclusion of the psychological literature, therefore, is that people should be encouraged to generate ideas on their own and meetings should be used to evaluate these ideas. The same rule applies in business as in your personal life. Generating ideas about where to go on holiday, what to write that new sitcom about, what question your research should address, and so on, are best done alone.

Groups aren't where ideas are born, but where they come to sink or swim.

Thanks to PsyBlog

Who's Bossing the Bosses?

Most organizations are in sweat denial. It's like a cosy club where the power players agree to turn a blind eye and fiddle around the edges. Middle managers protect their managers. Top leaders don't know what's going on down below.

According to a Corporate Leadership Council study the single most important factor affecting staff engagement is the quality of a person's manager, and another study found that 80 percent of people who resign from their jobs do so because they can't stand their boss. A Gallup poll revealed recently that nearly 25 percent of all employees in the U.S. would fire their boss if given the chance.

Yet, according to former IBM human resources executive Andrew O'Keeffe, author of the novel, The Boss, most organizations avoid fixing the biggest internal restraint on their business – lifting the capability of their managers and holding them to account for their people responsibilities. He believes that company leaders and human resources professionals fail in their employee/employer relationship because they don't recognize the obvious – that it's about addressing the tough stuff of bossing the bosses. Many organizations prefer to sweat the small stuff.

"There is a light bulb that needs to be turned on to overcome a fundamental blind spot," said O'Keeffe. "We don't realize or don't acknowledge that the relationship people have with their boss is emotional. We have attended to the issue of management as though it is rational – it's not. It's emotional. When you ask people about their boss, as I have done, you get an instant emotional reaction – good or bad. I rarely received a neutral response."

"The reason I wrote The Boss as a novel based on true stories is to reveal that the relationship between people and their boss is emotion, and that the relationship has a major impact on people's spirit and output.

O'Keeffe said companies can systematically lift the quality of managers in their organizations and reduce the negative emotional response and sapping of staff energy by following five rules:

• Design a "Do-able" Job: To enable managers to do their job, their role first needs to be structured so that they have a sensible number of people reporting to them. More than nine people get managers into trouble. Moreover, organizations have to articulate clear expectations and define what constitutes success for the manager in the eyes of top management.

• Hire Well: Hiring is 90 percent of success, so don't let middle managers appoint lower level managers without review. Use the hiring step to lift the caliber of your managers and ensure they have people skills.

• Give Them Tools: Provide managers with practical leadership tools for recruiting staff, orienting staff, planning and reviewing work, conducting developing discussions and managing pay and rewards.

• Invest in Skill Development: Most managers are appointed to their roles because of their technical skills. Yet the people dimension of their role is the most complex and unpredictable and the area they are least prepared for. There is a need for skilling – of frameworks, ideas, concepts, and practice.

• Hold Managers Accountable: Senior leaders need to know the managers who are doing well at their people responsibilities, and those who are not. They need to help and push the ones who lag behind. Organizations must implement a feedback loop, such as engagement surveys of staff on their managers, "skip" interviews by senior leaders and morale reviews by HR.

Every day, managers have events at work which are moments that define their relationship with their staff such as project reviews, team meetings, performance appraisal and pay reviews. The way managers deal with these events defines their leadership authority. If they do these events well, their leadership authority is enhanced, but if they do them poorly, their leadership authority is eroded.

Thanks to Industry News

The Power of Love Includes Stress Relief

Calling Cupid: Love has a particularly welcome role in stress relief. Loving relationships can help relieve stress and boost your overall health. Find out how to reap the rewards.

Love does wonderful things for your state of mind, and it also offers natural stress relief. In healthy relationships, the power of love is strong enough to keep your heart happy and your mind and body healthy.

Stress Relief: How Love Helps

Sharing in life's joys and challenges is one of the great benefits of being in a relationship.

"When you are in a loving marriage or a good relationship, you have somebody there to share your worries with, to talk through problems with, to enjoy free time with," says Sally R. Connolly, a social worker and therapist with the Couples Clinic of Louisville in Louisville, Ky. Relationships can provide stress relief by simply not leaving you to shoulder every burden completely on your own, Connelly explains.

You also have someone "to visualize the future with. Somebody who is there for you and witnesses your life," adds Connolly. A number of studies have found that people in healthy marriages live longer and have fewer health problems than people who are unhappily married or not in a relationship, according to Connolly. Such is the power of love. What's more, people who are happily married not only benefit from stress relief, they suffer less often from depression, too.

A loving partner can share the responsibility of stressful situations, offer support, a listening ear, and advice when you need it. And when you need to remember happier, easier times, a loving partner can help with that as well.

Stress Relief: Mending Relationships

If you have a relationship with a spouse, partner, or loved one that is a little rocky, focus on fixing it. An unhealthy relationship is just one more stressor that you don't need, and repairing it can provide stress relief and improve your health — and, you'll just feel better about it.

Getting started can be tough, but Connolly suggests just reaching out to your loved one. Consider whether there was a problem or issue that divided the relationship that needs to be addressed before you can move on. Or, if you just grew apart, work on rebuilding that relationship.

Stress Relief: Warming Up to Relationships

Not everyone is comfortable with affection — perhaps it's just your personality or the influence of family when you were growing up. If being affectionate is difficult for you, consider trying to start expressing your feelings to those in your life who you love, to strengthen these relationships.

"Showing affection may actually only be a habit, and people can learn how to change habits," says Connolly.

She recommends starting in small steps, reaching out physically (hugging or a gentle touch) or with affectionate words or actions. From there, she says, you can slowly build on your relationship and your physical affection. "Congratulate yourself each time that you stretch out of your comfort zone, and notice the effect that it has on your partner," says Connolly.

Stress Relief: Learning to Show Affection

She also suggests that you consider what kind of affection you want in your relationship, visualize what that affection is and how to show it, and practice those activities in your head to get accustomed to being more affectionate. Read books about ways of showing affection, or look for examples in movies or television shows.

"Think about affection and how much you care about the person that you want to show affection to. Think about that a lot during the day," says Connolly.

Life presents many challenges and stressors, and you need someone there to support you through the difficult times — whether it's a good friend, family member, spouse, or partner. And it's equally important to have someone to share in happy times and celebrations. Take time to focus on the relationships in your life, and reap the benefits. Just knowing that you have love, support, and help from a loved one can give you positive stress relief.

Learn more about balance.

By Diana Rodriguez / Medically reviewed by Lindsey Marcellin, MD, MPH