An alien, having just landed on earth, comes up to you and says, "I have been hearing a lot about this condition you humans call 'low self esteem'". Tell me, what is 'low self esteem', and how do you create it?"
You, thinking yourself a bit of an expert on low self esteem, are about to correct the friendly alien – after all, low self esteem isn't something you create is it? But then you get to thinking.
"Hmmm, well if you were going to set about creating low self esteem from scratch, I guess this is what you would do", you say. The alien listens attentively…
1) Firstly, blame yourself for lots of things that go wrong, or even those things you hear about going wrong for other people. Have an emotional reaction to this, namely anxiety.
2) Make negative sweeping statements about yourself and avoid challenging them. Things like "I'm stupid", "I always do that wrong", "Why is my life such as mess", "I'll make a mess of it so there's no point trying". And most importantly, believe they are true.
3) Whatever you do, don't identify the problems with your thinking styles and create a step-by-step, solution-focused plan for improving them and learning new thinking skills. This sort of problem-solving will seriously impair your ability to create lasting low self esteem.
4) Blindly accept negative or abusive comments made about you by others, without regard for their motivations, their own warped view of life or any facts that contradict their statement.
5) Do not identify any self-defeating patterns you have established in your life, or make concrete plans to alter them.
6) Forget about your achievements, or (just as good), write them off as 'nothing'. Ensure you do not gain any emotional satisfaction from achievements by the use of statements such as "anyone could do that".
7) Make sure you do not meet your basic needs as this will make creating low self esteem much easier
"Thank you" says your alien. "I must say that the human race has great perseverance. That must all be a lot of effort."
http://www.self-confidence.co.uk/articles/7-tips-to-maintain-low-self-esteem/
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