Just because you are an entrepreneur, or work in a startup, you can't ignore the rules of building and maintaining relationships. Many despise these experiences in corporate environments, and leave for a startup, only to find that they have to be able to navigate a similar minefield there of workplace and business relationships to be successful.
Jan Yager, Ph.D., an author and speaker on this and related subjects, outlines in her latest book "Productive Relationships: 57 Strategies for Building Stronger Business Connections." From my experience and hers, here are ten top relationship strategies for people in startups:
- Create a favorable first impression. You only get one chance for a first impression. Don't miss an opportunity for face-to-face communication, where you can use body language that welcomes relating, estimated at over 50% of all communication. Limit the use of e-mail and texting for early interactions, where you miss the body language.
- Avoid negative personality types. By recognizing negative personality types, like the control freak, the blameless type, the idea thief, and the entitled, you will have a better chance of not taking his or her behavior personally. Avoid associating with them.
- Proactively form relationships with positive types. These are the people who will help you to thrive and prosper. They include real mentors, facilitators, visionaries, motivators, and negotiators. Of course, it still pays to keep your eyes open and carry your own weight.
- Find a way to motivate others to want to get along with you. Understand your own agenda, and figure out the agenda of others, hidden or obvious, to make it a win-win relationship. How can you appeal to others on an emotional level to work together?
- Reexamine your attitude toward conflict. Some conflict is inevitable. The key is how to deal effectively with it. Recognize points of view, respond to what happened, resolve what needs to be resolved, and reflect on the lessons learned. Then move on.
- Deal with the "back-off" before it turns antagonistic. Rather than have a confrontation, someone backs off. You can't make someone want to deal with you, but you can try to increase their motivation to deal with you – like getting together for lunch, or trying to communicate in another way.
- Benefit from harsh feedback about your work. Receiving criticism is never easy. Try some recovery techniques, like taking a deep breath, give yourself time, and look at the issue from their perspective. Keep your initial response short and sweet and in control.
- Cope with the "lonely at the top" syndrome. One of the prices that you pay for being a CEO is giving up a lot of the social relationships within the company. There is a line beyond which you cannot go. You cannot compromise what is right for the company just to be liked. Join associations, or rely on your family for support and feedback.
- Say goodbye, if leaving is the best option. Sometimes it's better to just move on, rather than endure extended pain. Even if you cannot quit this instant, you can at least start looking for a new job. Be proactive in planning for your next position.
- Use social networking to improve your work relationships. Savvy workers at all levels are using these sites to develop and strengthen their business relationships as well as to reconnect with previous business connections. Make your own luck by giving and seeking referrals.
Compounding these strategies in today's startup environment are two divergent concepts: a heightened degree of competitiveness, and a greater emphasis on teamwork. This means you need even more emphasis on effectively engaging others, and learning to deal effectively with potentially negative work relationships.
The startup world of the past, run by a couple of autocrats, no longer works. To succeed in today's collaborative, customer-driven, networked economy, requires real business relationship efforts by everyone involved. No matter where you are in the spectrum, there is no time like the present to kick it up a notch.
Thanks to Martin Zwilling / Forbes.com LLC™